INFJ Personality (“The Advocate”)

The INFJ personality type is very rare, making up less than one percent of the population, but they nonetheless leave their mark on the world. As Diplomats, they have an inborn sense of idealism and morality, but what sets them apart is the accompanying Judging (J) trait – INFJs are not idle dreamers, but people capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.

INFJs tend to see helping others as their purpose in life, but while people with this personality type can be found engaging rescue efforts and doing charity work, their real passion is to get to the heart of the issue so that people need not be rescued at all.
INFJ personality

Help Me Help You

INFJs indeed share a unique combination of traits: though soft-spoken, they have very strong opinions and will fight tirelessly for an idea they believe in. They are decisive and strong-willed, but will rarely use that energy for personal gain – INFJs will act with creativity, imagination, conviction and sensitivity not to create advantage, but to create balance. Egalitarianism and karma are very attractive ideas to INFJs, and they tend to believe that nothing would help the world so much as using love and compassion to soften the hearts of tyrants.

Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.

Martin Luther King

INFJs find it easy to make connections with others, and have a talent for warm, sensitive language, speaking in human terms, rather than with pure logic and fact. It makes sense that their friends and colleagues will come to think of them as quiet Extraverted types, but they would all do well to remember that INFJs need time alone to decompress and recharge, and to not become too alarmed when they suddenly withdraw. INFJs take great care of other’s feelings, and they expect the favor to be returned – sometimes that means giving them the space they need for a few days.

Live to Fight Another Day

Really though, it is most important for INFJs to remember to take care of themselves. The passion of their convictions is perfectly capable of carrying them past their breaking point and if their zeal gets out of hand, they can find themselves exhausted, unhealthy and stressed. This becomes especially apparent when INFJs find themselves up against conflict and criticism – their sensitivity forces them to do everything they can to evade these seemingly personal attacks, but when the circumstances are unavoidable, they can fight back in highly irrational, unhelpful ways.

To INFJs, the world is a place full of inequity – but it doesn’t have to be. No other personality type is better suited to create a movement to right a wrong, no matter how big or small. INFJs just need to remember that while they’re busy taking care of the world, they need to take care of themselves, too.

Advocates You May Know

2 years ago
Wow... This is crazy. Please hear me out guys, and even reply with your own thoughts! I've always had an "ideal" that I wanted to live up to, moral code, standards. I've never expected other people to be perfect... but I was always trying to improve myself. My brother used to tell me "you're too hard on people".. The thing is, I treat people the way I treat myself (but with more love) and the way I want others to treat me. I always wanted what was best for others, using my intuition to offer solid remarks, mostly in a loving tone and always from a genuine place. But I learned that a lot of people don't want help to improve, like I do. They want to do what they want and for you to say nothing.. even if they are flooring it down a road with a cliff for a dead end. I've cared for other people more than I've cared for myself, fought for people harder than I've fought for myself.. Always treating people the way I wish I was treated. Trying to save people before they reach rock bottom like I did. But, people react differently, they handle situations differently. My world got turned upside down when I got turned inside out. I fell short of my "ideals", my standards, my moral compass was broken.. And when I finally realized my mistakes, it was like the end of my world! My worst nightmare as an INFJ, was not being the person that I was so desperately trying to be.. to not like who I was on the inside. To feel like.. a "monster" - to be deceitful and lie to myself and abandon my ideals. I hit rock bottom and I couldn't get up. I couldn't get out of bed. I felt a literal weight on me and every heartbeat felt like a punch inside my chest. The trauma was crippling and I couldn't run from it. Anything else, I could have dug my heels in and popped up swinging but... I couldn't run from myself. Are any other INFJ's very hard on themselves? Always able to forgive others, look for the best in people, give them the benefit of a doubt.. but never feel worthy to do it for yourself? I have dreams, I have talents, I have hopes.. but I've been afraid to try. I want to make people happy and give more of myself, but I've withdrawn into myself. I know I'll break free. Just have to keep keeping on. But it's hard. Also, during arguments.. I make sure I don't hurl fireballs at people.. I don't want to cause irreversible damage - because with my attitude, I could say some unimaginable garbage that could make a grown man cry. . But I keep it in check. And if someone crosses the line and says something unforgivable.. I exit the conversation, exit the building, exit the car.. because I'm not about to sit there and take a bullet aimed straight for my heart when I'm trying so hard to protect or help that person. If he/she deliberately tries to hurt me.. peace.. I'm out. Is anyone else like this?
1 year ago
I hear you. I also am much easier on other people than myself, and I too work to improve myself and my life. I often feel inadequate, like my standards are unreachable, or sometimes too low. Along with the knowledge of people form just a glance, comes responsibility. I know exactly what I could say, what I could do to hurt someone to the point of horror. But I have never used it on another person, only on myself, because I know that I can take it.
2 years ago
This is very true! I always thought I was weird for being both an introvert and opinionated, but now I know that there are others like me!
2 years ago
Wow, this was really accurate... I can't believe that only less than 1 percent of the entire world's population is like this... But really, I do find myself too quiet, and reserved... Sometimes I feel like I hide my real emotions as well, and if only the rest of the world could hear my ideas...
2 years ago
I finally understand why I feel so misunderstood. For example, I can only tolerate people for so long and it's not like I mean to cut people off, but I do have to "recharge" as a section of the article discusses. I'm often described as an old soul, beyond wiser than my age of 20 and more perceptive to the cruelties of the world. I feel like everywhere I turn, there is corruption and people live with easily, as if its completely natural while I often have difficulties working in workplaces where there are rude or corrupted individuals. Even school is a challenge: So much to choose from, interacting with seemingly rude individuals, being tired of going to class because you don't feel as if your life is going anywhere productive, just wanting to drop everything and run away/ travel/ change the world, etc. Back to the challenge at hand: dealing with people. I often come home to retreat into my bedroom, not even having the energy to greet my loved ones nor wanting to. Sometimes I spend up to HALF of my day alone and in solace with nothing but my thoughts, my iPod, or a notepad. There's so much that goes on in this brain of mine, but so little words to explain and I for sure know that I wouldn't want to in fear of being judged. I once dated this guy who criticized my optimism for changing the world. He was very cynical towards my feelings and my goals, calling them irrational. According to him and others my way of thinking and living would not ensure nor secure a life of "security" as I would always be held back for my need to help others instead of focusing on myself (I don't know if this makes sense as this is my first time ever talking about this). What I can say is that we are a rare group and perhaps this is the reason why we are so misunderstood, but nevertheless, I will always see light in the midst of darkness. And I will always lend a helping hand to those in need as my happiness derives from the happiness and security of those in my life and my life's journey. I'm so happy to have gotten a clear sense of who I am as an INFJ.
2 years ago
"Help me help you"...that describes me so perfectly!
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