“My instinct is to protect my children from pain. But adversity is often the thing that gives us character and backbone.”
As parents Advocates, much as in their friendships, will tend to look at their relationships with their children as opportunities to learn and grow with someone they care about, while working to achieve a distinctly separate but important goal – raising someone to be an independent, responsible and principled adult.
People with the Advocate personality type are unflinching in their devotion to their children, willing to grin and bear any burden without hesitation. While warm and compassionate throughout the parenting relationship, what Advocates are really looking forward to is being able to communicate and relate to the person they helped to raise, as equals.
Be Unique, Just Like Me
As their children grow, Advocates will likely try to project a great deal of their own qualities onto them, demanding the same sort of idealism and honesty that they demand from themselves, and maybe even manipulating them into this in their weaker moments. Despite this, Advocate personalities will also push their children to think independently, make their own choices and establish their own beliefs.
If all this independence is taken to heart, it can cause some trouble for Advocate parents though, as their children move into the naturally rebellious phase of adolescence. If Advocates’ children take a contrarian approach, adopting beliefs that violate their parents’ own well-developed principles, Advocates are likely to feel like their children are pointing out their flaws by following another path, a hurtful thing to such a sensitive personality type.
A Job Well Done
Ultimately though, Advocate parents will realize that these conflicting beliefs aren’t a sign of their failure, but of their success in raising someone who did indeed learn to form their own ideals. As they mature, Advocates’ children will also come to appreciate the combination of independence and personal responsibility they were raised with. So long as their child grows up with a firm understanding of the difference between right and wrong and is able to fight for a cause they believe in, striving to be the best they can be, Advocate parents will be satisfied with what they’ve accomplished together with their child.