“The most I can do for my friend is simply be his friend.”
There is a running theme with Advocates, and that is a yearning for authenticity and sincerity – in their activities, their romantic relationships, and their friendships. People with the Advocate personality type are unlikely to go for friendships of circumstance, like workplace social circles or chatting up their local baristas, where the only thing they really have in common is a day-to-day familiarity. Rather, Advocates seek out people who share their passions, interests and ideologies, people with whom they can explore philosophies and subjects that they believe are truly meaningful.
Closed Book and Speed Reader
From the start, it can be a challenge to get to know Advocates, as they are very private, even enigmatic. Advocate personalities don’t readily share their thoughts and feelings, not unless they are comfortable, and since those thoughts and feelings are the basis for Advocate friendships, it can take time and persistence to get to know them. Meanwhile, Advocates are very insightful and have a particular knack for seeing beyond others’ facades, interpreting intent and compatibility quickly and easily, and weeding out those who don’t share the depth of their idealism.
Advocates are often perfectionistic, looking for ultimate compatibility, and yet also look for someone with whom they can grow and improve in tandem. Needless to say, this is a tall order, and Advocates should try to remember that they are a particularly rare personality type, and even if they find someone compatible in that sense, the odds that they will also share every interest are slim. If they don’t learn to meet others halfway and recognize that the kind of self-improvement and depth they demand is simply exhausting for many types, Advocates are likely end up abandoning healthy friendships in their infancy, in search of more perfect compatibilities.
Like Finding a Needle in a Haystack
Further complicating things are Advocates’ eloquence and persuasiveness, which lead to a lot of (unwanted) attention and popularity. Their quiet, determined idealism and imaginative expression naturally draw influence, and if there’s anything Advocate personalities avoid, it’s the accumulation of power over others – and the people who are drawn to that type of power.
Advocates will find themselves more sought after than they’d ever care to be, making it even more difficult for them to find someone they truly have an affinity with. Really the only way to be counted among Advocates’ true friends is to be authentic, and to have that authenticity naturally reflect their own.
Once a common thread is found though, people with the Advocate personality type make loyal and supportive companions, encouraging growth and life-enriching experiences with warmth, excitement and care. As trust grows, Advocates will share more of what lies beneath the surface, and if those ideas and motives are mutual, it’s the sort of friendship that will transcend time and distance, lasting a lifetime.
Advocate personalities don’t require a great deal of day-to-day attention – for them, quality trumps quantity every time, and over the years they will likely end up with just a few true friendships, built on a richness of mutual understanding that forges an indelible link between them.