INFP Personality (“The Mediator”)

INFP personalities are true idealists, always looking for the hint of good in even the worst of people and events, searching for ways to make things better. While they may be perceived as calm, reserved, or even shy, INFPs have an inner flame and passion that can truly shine. Comprising just 4% of the population, the risk of feeling misunderstood is unfortunately high for the INFP personality type – but when they find like-minded people to spend their time with, the harmony they feel will be a fountain of joy and inspiration.

INFP personality

Being a part of the Diplomat personality group, INFPs are guided by their principles, rather than by logic (Analysts), excitement (Explorers), or practicality (Sentinels). When deciding how to move forward, they will look to honor, beauty, morality and virtue – INFPs are led by the purity of their intent, not rewards and punishments. People who share the INFP personality type are proud of this quality, and rightly so, but not everyone understands the drive behind these feelings, and it can lead to isolation.

All that is gold does not glitter; not all those who wander are lost; the old that is strong does not wither; deep roots are not reached by the frost.

J. R. R. Tolkien

We Know What We Are, but Know Not What We May Be

At their best, these qualities enable INFPs to communicate deeply with others, easily speaking in metaphors and parables, and understanding and creating symbols to share their ideas. The strength of this intuitive communication style lends itself well to creative works, and it comes as no surprise that many famous INFPs are poets, writers and actors. Understanding themselves and their place in the world is important to INFPs, and they explore these ideas by projecting themselves into their work.

INFPs have a talent for self-expression, revealing their beauty and their secrets through metaphors and fictional characters.

INFPs’ ability with language doesn’t stop with their native tongue, either – as with most people who share the Diplomat personality types, they are considered gifted when it comes to learning a second (or third!) language. Their gift for communication also lends itself well to INFPs’ desire for harmony, a recurring theme with Diplomats, and helps them to move forward as they find their calling.

Listen to Many People, but Talk to Few

Unlike their Extraverted cousins though, INFPs will focus their attention on just a few people, a single worthy cause – spread too thinly, they’ll run out of energy, and even become dejected and overwhelmed by all the bad in the world that they can’t fix. This is a sad sight for INFPs’ friends, who will come to depend on their rosy outlook.

If they are not careful, INFPs can lose themselves in their quest for good and neglect the day-to-day upkeep that life demands. INFPs often drift into deep thought, enjoying contemplating the hypothetical and the philosophical more than any other personality type. Left unchecked, INFPs may start to lose touch, withdrawing into "hermit mode", and it can take a great deal of energy from their friends or partner to bring them back to the real world.

Luckily, like the flowers in spring, INFP’s affection, creativity, altruism and idealism will always come back, rewarding them and those they love perhaps not with logic and utility, but with a world view that inspires compassion, kindness and beauty wherever they go.

Mediators You May Know

A Small INFP
2 years ago
95% introverted, 80% intuitive, 89% feeling, 82% prospecting, and 84% turbulent. Poor old me. But I identify with this so much, it makes me very happy.
3am writer
2 years ago
I think I've unconsciously been on a quest to find a best friend to share all of my thoughts and feelings with for my entire life. It's kind of terrifying how accurate the description was about how unfulfilling many of our friendships are. It feels like I'm always gaining more friends that need my support but are unable to give me much in return. I've had so many deep conversations with strangers, acquaintances, friends I've lost contact with. It's been interesting but I want more than just someone to talk to. Do other INFP-T's tire of texting? It has so many limitations on expression and it's exhausting sometimes. Also, at some point I started constantly distracting myself with music and tv shows because I was too afraid of being left alone with my thoughts. I didn't want to spend a minute un-entertained or unconnected to something. I was younger and more volatile, and incredibly critical of myself. Sometimes I'm afraid that I've stifled my inner dreamer.
1 year ago
I could not agree with you more! Everything that you said hit home for how I'm feeling right now, it really is a terrible struggle and inner battle that can make us feel worn out and confused.
1 year ago
Personally when depressed I get absorbed in any kind of fiction whether books or games. I also feel lucky in that I have a brother who I could confide in and bounce ideas off of (And he'd do the same to me). However aside from him I'm in the same boat as you. When I go to a place on a daily basis I typically get along with most people and get to know them to a certain extent, but whenever I go into "hermit mode" no one tries to get me out of it and I end up losing contact with people. Friends I had in highschool stopped keeping in touch with me after a bit and no one seems to truly understand. I'm also more than with you on the texting front. I type slow (Because I have giant hands and typically tiny phones) and keeping up with other people is tiring especially when I'm trying to compose my thoughts properly between texts. Sorry that there isn't any point to my ramblings. I guess what I was trying to get across is your not alone in these feelings, and that I hope you find that someone to fill the gap with.
11 months ago
I'm so glad you mentioned everything that you did. I have had few good friends in my lifetime, but none that really stood the test of time and in the end I really saw that I gave into the friendships more than I received. I HATE texting! I am the worst at it. I would prefer calling over texting but ultimately face-to-face is best. I also realized a while back that I had lost my "inner sense of wonder" during my high school years and suffered tremendously from anxiety and depression. In the past year I have re-discovered my dreams, passions, and creativity. Please know that things do get better. As far as finding a best friend, I found a best friend in Jesus because he is someone that always listened and cared and shared in my dreams with me. It was also nice to know that he was fully excepting of me and never judged me or criticized me or misunderstood me. It's been the only truly fulfilling relationship in my life. I hope that helps you to feel less alone and a little more hopeful.
2 years ago
This is very accurate, and it helped me understand myself more
2 years ago
I have always loved making up stories and plays, but i'm too lazy to write them down...
2 years ago
Wow, it even knows that I wanna become a psychologist xD This one is amazing.. It knows things about me that I had never thought of. It helped me so much, and makes me think that I am actually understood despite all the frustration I feel throughout the day. Thanks...!
11 months ago
I also studied Psychology!! :)
2 weeks ago
I want to become one too!
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