INFJ Relationships

When it comes to romantic relationships, INFJs take the process of finding a partner seriously. Not ones for casual encounters, people with the INFJ personality type instead look for depth and meaning in their relationships. INFJs will take the time necessary to find someone they truly connect with – once they’ve found that someone, their relationships will reach a level of depth and sincerity that most people can only dream of.

INFJ romantic relationships

Getting to that point can sometimes be a challenge for potential partners, especially if they are the impatient type, as INFJs are often perfectionistic and picky. People with this personality type aren’t easily talked into something they don’t want, and if someone doesn’t pick up on that, it’s a trespass that is unlikely to be forgiven, particularly in the early stages of dating. Even worse is if a suitor tries to resort to manipulation or lying, as INFJs will see right through it, and if there’s anything they have a poor tolerance for in a relationship, it is inauthenticity.

Is This for Real?

One of the things INFJs find most important is establishing genuine, deep connections with the people they care about.

INFJs will go out of their way to seek out people who share their desire for authenticity, and out of their way to avoid those who don’t, especially when looking for a partner. All that being said, INFJs often have the advantage of desirability – they are warm, friendly, caring and insightful, seeing past facades and the obvious to understand others’ thoughts and emotions.

INFJs are enthusiastic in their relationships, and there is a sense of wisdom behind their spontaneity, allowing them to pleasantly surprise their partners again and again. INFJs aren’t afraid to show their love, and they feel it unconditionally, creating a depth to the relationship that can hardly be described in conventional terms. Relationships with INFJs are not for the uncommitted or the shallow.

When it comes to intimacy, INFJs look for a connection that goes beyond the physical, embracing the emotional and even spiritual connection they have with their partner. People with the INFJ personality type are passionate partners, and see intimacy as a way to express their love and to make their partners happy. INFJs cherish not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person, in mind, body and soul.

Jane Bender
3 years ago
"The INFJ takes the process of finding a partner very seriously..." -so true! I'm in highschool, and so many of my friends are dating left and right. I think it's stupid. Because, honestly, dating is the way of finding your spouse--not being entertained. If you're not planning on actually marrying someone, WHY ARE YOU WITH THEM? Are you dating them only to break up with them? It honestly makes no sense to me.
3 years ago
YES!!! This is exactly how I felt in high school! I didn't want to waste my time in a meaningless relationship. To me, dating isn't a game. I really want to find someone special that I truly connect with, which is why even at age 20 I've still never kissed nor been in a romantic relationship with anyone and my friends tell me that I'm being picky etc.
3 years ago
It is so hard for me to even get into a relationship because I do crave the genuine relationship. All of my friends always are in some sort of relationship, whether it be serious or otherwise. Which is all perfectly fine, I am happy for them. Always am as long as the relationship is a healthy one. I seem to, however, never find the connection I want with someone. All of my friends think I am too picky and should just "put myself out there" but I just need to connect with people on a different level. This is especially difficult because I'm pretty sure I have trust issues. (the only reason I'm saying this is because I'm never meeting any of you) It is so hard for me to receive that true connection and on the rare occasions I do, we are too close as friends to do anything about it. It is the viscous cycle that is my love life.
3 years ago
This is a great reflection of who I am and it's put into words that I can keep going back to. Thank you all for sharing your experiences and perspectives. Us INFJs need to keep in touch with each other and keep uplifting each other. Thank you again.
3 years ago
My boyfriend is an INFJ, he asked me to find out my personality because he "sensed" that I was "special" ... now it completely makes sense. We are both INFJs after all. He's the most amazing guy I have ever dated. He is so patient and down to earth, yet so intelligent and fills my emotional needs like no other guy I dated had. It's truly amazing and this test is wonderfully accurate. :)
3 years ago
Thank you all for sharing. I also feel like I really belonged but am often perplexed when people confide the most personal things to me. I am so glad I'm not the only one.
Your name: