INFJ Parents

As parents INFJs, much as in their friendships, will tend to look at their relationships with their children as opportunities to learn and grow with someone they care about, while working to achieve a distinctly separate but important goal – raising someone to be an independent, responsible and principled adult. People with the INFJ personality type are unflinching in their devotion to their children, willing to grin and bear any burden without hesitation. While warm and compassionate throughout the parenting relationship, what INFJs are really looking forward to is being able to communicate and relate to the person they helped to raise, as equals.

INFJ parents

Be Unique, Just Like Me

As their children grow, INFJs will likely try to project a great deal of their own qualities onto them, demanding the same sort of idealism and honesty that they demand from themselves, and maybe even manipulating them into this in their weaker moments. Despite this, INFJs will also push their children to think independently, make their own choices and establish their own beliefs.

The highest goal for INFJ parents is for their child’s choices and beliefs to culminate in a cause that they are able to act on, contributing to the world around them.

If all this independence is taken to heart, it can cause some trouble for INFJ parents though, as their children move into the naturally rebellious phase of adolescence. If INFJs’ children take a contrarian approach, adopting beliefs that violate their parents’ own well-developed principles, INFJs are likely to feel like their children are pointing out their flaws by following another path, a hurtful thing to such a sensitive personality type.

A Job Well Done

Ultimately though, INFJ parents will realize that these conflicting beliefs aren’t a sign of their failure, but of their success in raising someone who did indeed learn to form their own ideals. As they mature, INFJs’ children will also come to appreciate the combination of independence and personal responsibility they were raised with. So long as their child grows up with a firm understanding of the difference between right and wrong and is able to fight for a cause they believe in, striving to be the best they can be, INFJ parents will be satisfied with what they’ve accomplished together with their child.

Ivan Josip
3 years ago
And I was wondering why she is going her own way?! Even she doesn't want to speak to me after my divorce now I fully understand her and my thoughts...
3 years ago
I don't even have kids yet I'm just 20 but this is exactly how I plan to raise them. Like I've always thought that first and foremost they need to know about what is right and what is wrong. They need to have a strong base about that then I'll give them chance to be on their own feet. While watching. From behind :')
4 years ago
Totally agree with this... in fact my oldest son is the sum total of all this... knows right from wrong, fights for a cause... my younger son is likely to follow as well...
Jacob Stafford
4 years ago
This describes me very well
Amie E.
4 years ago
As an INFJ parent with a teen going through rebellious stage, I want her to be independent and to express her ideas. However, I get deeply hurt by many of the comments she makes and fret endlessly about where her decisions are taking her. At the end of the day, I know that it's her path she's following and I can't make those decisions for her.
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