INFJ Friends

There is a running theme with INFJs, and that is a yearning for authenticity and sincerity – in their activities, their romantic relationships, and their friendships. People with the INFJ personality type are unlikely to go for friendships of circumstance, like workplace social circles or chatting up their local baristas, where the only thing they really have in common is a day-to-day familiarity. Rather, INFJs seek out people who share their passions, interests and ideologies, people with whom they can explore philosophies and subjects that they believe are truly meaningful.

INFJ friends

Closed Book and Speed Reader

From the start, it can be a challenge to get to know INFJs, as they are very private, even enigmatic. INFJs don’t readily share their thoughts and feelings, not unless they are comfortable, and since those thoughts and feelings are the basis for INFJ friendships, it can take time and persistence to get to know them. Meanwhile, INFJs are very insightful and have a particular knack for seeing beyond others’ facades, interpreting intent and compatibility quickly and easily, and weeding out those who don’t share the depth of their idealism.

In friendship it is as though INFJs are searching for a soul mate, someone who shares every facet of their passions and imagination.

INFJs are often perfectionistic, looking for ultimate compatibility, and yet also look for someone with whom they can grow and improve in tandem. Needless to say, this is a tall order, and INFJs should try to remember that they are a particularly rare personality type, and even if they find someone compatible in that sense, the odds that they will also share every interest are slim. If they don’t learn to meet others halfway and recognize that the kind of self-improvement and depth they demand is simply exhausting for many types, INFJs are likely end up abandoning healthy friendships in their infancy, in search of more perfect compatibilities.

Like Finding a Needle in a Haystack

Further complicating things are INFJs’ eloquence and persuasiveness, which lead to a lot of (unwanted) attention and popularity. Their quiet, determined idealism and imaginative expression naturally draw influence, and if there’s anything INFJs avoid, it’s the accumulation of power over others – and the people who are drawn to that type of power. INFJs will find themselves more sought after than they’d ever care to be, making it even more difficult for them to find someone they truly have an affinity with. Really the only way to be counted among INFJs’ true friends is to be authentic, and to have that authenticity naturally reflect their own.

Once a common thread is found though, people with the INFJ personality type make loyal and supportive companions, encouraging growth and life-enriching experiences with warmth, excitement and care. As trust grows, INFJs will share more of what lies beneath the surface, and if those ideas and motives are mutual, it’s the sort of friendship that will transcend time and distance, lasting a lifetime. INFJs don’t require a great deal of day-to-day attention – for them, quality trumps quantity every time, and over the years they will likely end up with just a few true friendships, built on a richness of mutual understanding that forges an indelible link between them.

Yaser Rashidi
4 years ago
This is accurate. I always find there's a hidden shield/barriers between me and EVERYONE even in the most intimate/friendly talks. There's just too much inner-talk within myself. Always find it hard to communicate the true meaning of my ideas to others, always feel not-understanded, not-appreciated and it's because I can not communicate at my best. That's why I'm isolated within boundaries of my home, work from home and seldom leave.
anonymous person you'll never know
4 years ago
Wow i don't think I have any friends because my sensitive gets in the way and i shouted at to friend face because i was at my high point. I'm a very lonely kid nobody gets me never my family it look like I'm going to look for a new begaing just don't know when .Urrrgh I hate not knowing . This makes sense and can help me I think haveing friends is had because you don't completely trust them because they might be your friend because of money or you might think there your friend because they don't understand you and think your INFJ personality thing makes you weird but it makes you different and special. Nobody understand me !
Jason tarwaters
4 years ago
I'm a infj, Aquarius is my zodiac sign. I found this test refreshing. How accurate it was at pinpointing my feelings is still stunning. All I can really say to those who developed this test and brought forth your theory/hypothesis. Well played :) I enjoyed it.
4 years ago
You just described my social life. Only have a couple of friends. They are all insanely close to me.
4 years ago
Hit the nail on the head there
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