How to Date an Analyst Personality Type

Kyle's avatar

The Analyst personality types – Architect (INTJ), Logician (INTP), Commander (ENTJ), and Debater (ENTP) – have interesting quirks and qualities. Dating one of these personalities isn’t always easy, as they may not be very focused on social bonding and niceties. Yet they’re just as likely to be bright, joyful souls – and as attractive – as any type.

Fun fact: In our research, Analysts generally score lowest in vanity but highest in ego. Perhaps they do care about how they look but less about whether other people approve?

Analysts can be exciting and challenging partners, and I’ve got some tips to help you woo them successfully (our Relationship Tools and Assessments go deeper into intertype compatibility). Let’s start with some general advice on building a connection, and then I’ll get into some guidance on different styles of dates, based on personality type. Here we go!

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Tips for Dating an Analyst

1. Prepare Yourself

The first step in dating an Analyst is to understand their personality type. (If you’re not sure what it is and can’t have them take our test, use our free Type Guesser.) Reading about the Analyst Role is also a good idea, as is searching our articles. As you do, take off your steamy, rose-colored glasses and objectively consider the information about Analyst personalities. Still interested in dating this person? Excellent.

2. Be Relatively Direct

You have your own way of approaching and attracting people, so use that, but increase the degree of verbal candor. Most Analysts dislike – and aren’t attuned to – cagey emotional subtleties. They may inadvertently signal rejection simply because they missed your oh-so-adept flirting. You might spark their interest but still need to spur action with plain words more often than you’d think.

3. Establish Parameters Early

Analysts like figuring out systems, including social relationships. They like to “assess the situation” and act accordingly, and they may get frustrated by receiving inconsistent information over time. It’s often best to express your needs and preferences clearly up front. One caveat: things change, and it’s important to communicate that as well. The sooner you let an Analyst know something, the quicker they’ll adapt to it.

4. Be Ready to Argue Half Seriously

Analysts enjoy exploring subjects through spirited give-and-take, but this is often just an intellectual exercise. Many of their expressed views are more like experimental theories than sincere philosophies, so it’s best to take them lightly. These personality types may get fired up and appreciate cheerful debate, but heading into serious territory can distract from your shared fun.

5. Be Cautious about Too Much Touching

Physical closeness and touching can be a great way to flirt and build mutual warmth, but many Analysts may initially be hesitant about receiving or giving such attention. (Take our “Sense of Touch” survey and check out Analysts’ response rates.) It’s not that you shouldn’t touch them – just pay careful attention to their reactions and be considerate of their comfort level as you go.

6. Try to Understand Their Interests

This might seem like generic dating advice, but just wait until an Analyst goes into esoteric detail about some idea, personal specialty, or hobby. You may find it interesting, but listening can take some mental fortitude and patience – they can get pretty intense. Side note: Get a balanced perspective by noting any differences between what they do and what they talk about doing.

7. Don’t Pressure Them to Dance

Just don’t. Offer, and if they want to, they will.

Different Types, Different Dates

Asking someone out isn’t always easy, nor is figuring out how to make it fun. Here’s some advice on making a date appealing to each of the four Analyst personality types.

Architects

A well-planned agenda without too much of the unexpected (or heavy socializing) is a good idea for this personality type, initially. Activities and experiences that you can engage in together and that don’t force mutual reliance or intimacy too quickly can also help them relax and have fun. (For example, rent two kayaks instead of a two-person kayak.) You can branch out as you get to know each other better.

Logicians

A loose date plan that features low-pressure exploration of the unfamiliar is often a hit with these personalities. They love to learn, observe, and think, though they aren’t always comfortable jumping into energetic action right away. Nature walks, low-key creative activities (like arts and crafts), and passive mental consumption (like touring a museum or watching a performance) might be a good way to start things off.

Commanders

A chance to flex a skill or ability together is a great way to get this personality type’s attention, whether it highlights yours (they’ll respect you for it) or theirs (they’ll be proud to show it off). Somewhat more dynamic activities (sports, busy social environments) that encourage bold participation as well as discussion and analysis can appeal to them. Keep the action going, and you’ll hold their interest.

Debaters

There isn’t a more flexible, energetic personality than Debaters, so a wide variety of active date options may appeal to people with this personality type. So make your offer, based on what you know about what excites your intended. It’s not that Debaters like everything, but you can make almost any invitation with little fear, because they’re usually blunt about what they do and don’t like. Just be careful what you start, because you’ll have to keep up with them.

Conclusions

Analysts have a reputation for social disregard, but that’s relative – their personal maturity and experience profoundly affect how they’ll respond to you. As a group, these personalities value understanding, and they try to make logical sense of everything – including people. So when it comes to starting something romantic with them, just show them who you really are, and in time, they’ll open their true selves to you too.

What’s the best thing about dating an Analyst? Maybe it’s that we’ll try to move mountains for those we love. What’s the worst thing about dating an Analyst? You’ll just have to find out, won’t you? Or tell us your opinion in the comments below…

Further Reading

  • Want to connect with someone? Check out our surveys together and see how your results compare – it might reveal interesting compatibilities between you.
  • If you’re really serious about understanding an Analyst, consider downloading their Premium Profile to find out what really makes them tick – and fires up their heart. Follow these links to get the Architect, Logician, Commander, or Debater Premium Profile.
  • Want to start some truly deep and revealing conversations with someone special? Try our fun, free, Get to Know Your Partner game.
  • Check out our article “Love and Thinking Introverts: 7 Ways to Better Romance.”
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Comments

Please to join the discussion.

INTJ avatar
Tip #7 is right on point; if at all possible, we will avoid places with dancing... I am an Architect, and I approve of this message.
INTJ avatar
Actually, I love partner/ballroom dancing. Other than the small talk.
INTP avatar
You're absolutely correct. I am a Logician, and I also approve of this message.
A grayscale avatar for an anonymous user
Should I ask out the INTP guy first, or should I wait for him to ask me out?
A grayscale avatar for an anonymous user
This is what in my mind rn.. I like someone who is INFJ. But i don't know how to start it. Should i wait or approach first or waiting for miracle to happen.
INTJ avatar
If you're really interested in him, definitely ask him out. Showing obvious interest is very attractive to most men as it doesn't happen often. Plus we tend to be clueless when it comes to hints so if you wait to be asked out, you may be waiting a long time
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We are analysts, we wait
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As a logician, I'm unlikely to invite him first, so I think you should take the initiative to invite him
ENTJ avatar
So true dude
INTP avatar
I dated a very analytical attorney.....all I can say is Yes! Yes! Yes! and Yes to all the suggestions in this article.
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As a Debater type, that last line is *SO* true. For example, if a woman I found attractive or interesting (or even vice versa in general) offered to do something I wouldn’t enjoy, I would straight up say “I’m totally up to doing something with you but would prefer doing something different if you don’t mind.” And start a conversation on the best possible options and opportunities for what would make the most sense at that time. Not only is it just the element of being up front about it and not having to fake and act like I’m enjoying something I’m not, but it’s also an opportunity if I don’t like an original idea or suggestion to still say clearly “I’m interested in doing something with you, but not that specific activity (or date or time if that were the issue instead) that keeps options open, flexibility to do something we both would enjoy, and make clear to them that the problem isn’t with the person as I still have interest, but with something that we can quickly and easily change with little harm done or risk involved. Which is why I think the best way to approach myself if I were in someone else’s shoes who wanted to initiate with me or someone like me, would be to be broad and allow for open endedness and spontaneity and flexibility to go with the flow and be like “Hey, do you want to hang out some time?” Rather than “Do you want to go to this fancy expensive restaurant with me at 8:00 pm on Saturday Night?” The difference being option one leaves so much more open to a “Yeah of course, sounds great, do you have any ideas or suggestions?” That we can then go back and forth on and compare/contrast while option 2 is a bit more awkward and like “I’m definitely interested in doing something with you, but that particular (date/time/place) doesn’t work for me unfortunately, do you want to try something else instead?” Which can, to some personalities, come off as a rejection that their idea wasn’t good enough, or wasn’t informed, or that I am the one who is unable to drop everything to make something happen for them, when in reality I view myself as much more likely than most to be like “Do you have anything you’re doing right now/tonight? I’d like to spend some time with you and find you attractive” than many other types, I just resist that specific structure and expectation element.
A grayscale avatar for an anonymous user
A relationship between infp and intp would work?
ENTP avatar
Actually, that is one of the most difficult relationships. It's in a different article from 16 personalities. Can't remember what's called though. But of course, if you like them and are prepared to make sacrifices, then do it! That's how I ended up dating a Consul (ESFJ). And if you can find the previously mentioned article, you can see some suggestions to better the relationship. But don't quote me, I've been single my entire life, up until 2 weeks ago.