INFJ relationships

When it comes to romantic relationships, INFJs take the process of finding a partner seriously. Not ones for casual encounters, people with the INFJ personality type instead look for depth and meaning in their relationships. INFJs will take the time necessary to find someone they truly connect with – once they’ve found that someone, their relationships will reach a level of depth and sincerity that most people can only dream of.

INFJ relationshipsGetting to that point can sometimes be a challenge for potential partners, especially if they are the impatient type, as INFJs are often perfectionistic and picky. People with this personality type aren’t easily talked into something they don’t want, and if someone doesn’t pick up on that, it’s a trespass that is unlikely to be forgiven, particularly in the early stages of dating. Even worse is if a suitor tries to resort to manipulation or lying, as INFJs will see right through it, and if there’s anything they have a poor tolerance for in a relationship, it is inauthenticity.

Is This For Real?

One of the things INFJs find most important is establishing genuine, deep connections with the people they care about.

INFJs will go out of their way to seek out people who share their desire for authenticity, and out of their way to avoid those who don’t, especially when looking for a partner. All that being said, INFJs often have the advantage of desirability – they are warm, friendly, caring and insightful, seeing past facades and the obvious to understand others’ thoughts and emotions.

INFJs are enthusiastic in their relationships, and there is a sense of wisdom behind their spontaneity, allowing them to pleasantly surprise their partners again and again. INFJs aren’t afraid to show their love, and they feel it unconditionally, creating a depth to the relationship that can hardly be described in conventional terms. Relationships with INFJs are not for the uncommitted or the shallow.

When it comes to intimacy, INFJs look for a connection that goes beyond the physical, embracing the emotional and even spiritual connection they have with their partner. People with the INFJ personality type are passionate partners, and see intimacy as a way to express their love and to make their partners happy. INFJs cherish not just the act of being in a relationship, but what it means to become one with another person, in mind, body and soul.

Strengths & Weaknesses


Your name:
Aug 27, 2014 17:37:24
This is so me. I often wonder why I feel so alone even in the midst of so many people.. family, friends.. and I had just changed my watsapp status to "misunderstood" earlier today... who knew I'm an INFJ personality... no wonder...
Aug 22, 2014 04:10:14
I also am INFJ. I wonder if there is any way to form a group?
Ngoni Griffith
Aug 21, 2014 03:16:58
I feel like I have found my true friends here. So many of the comments did feel like I was at home. I am 42 and still single, and feel so out of place in this world. All my life has been spent trying to make this world a better place for everyone, and yet people deem me as crazy. I quit my job and sold my car in order to become a missionary. I know that is my calling, yet trying to assimilate with the rest of the world who is 'normal'. I find it comforting that INFJ's are rare. Like a diamond, pink or yellow perhaps.
Aug 19, 2014 15:37:47
I think sometimes I am so misunderstood. I am truthful but I do care about people's feelings and don't want to hurt anyone. I always find the person in the crowd that is off in the corner and alone, because I feel that way. The feeling of not being a part of something is hard. Our hearts are in the right place.
Lexi Smith
Aug 16, 2014 07:15:19
This describes me extremely well. Fortunately, I found my true love very early in life completely by accident. I had no intention of involving myself in the world of relationships, romance, and sexuality. It all seemed too shallow and meaningless to me until I found my perfect partner. But when I found him, I realized how meaningful and fulfilling the right relationship is. Interestingly enough, he's an INTP. Both he and I have looked up analyses of the INTP/INFJ relationship, and it seems that our pairing is often coined the "Golden Pairing" by many psychologists. It's one of those pairings that either is perfect beyond imagining, or it completely fails. In my case, it is completely the former. The fact that we share our introversion and intuition traits really helps in our relationship, because it makes us very similar in many ways. We're both very introverted, so each of us understands why the other doesn't like being around a lot of people. We love being together more than anything else. Because we're both intuitive people, we both love ideas and concepts. We both understand things on an intuitive level, which allows us to communicate very easily with each other most of the time. These similarities are balanced by our differences, which are exemplified by our feeling/thinking and judging/perceiving dichotomies. The fact that he often thinks about situations and ideas in a more analytic way than I do is sometimes an issue for us, but we always make good come out of it. I help him be a more feeling person, and he helps me be a more rational person. He is a perceiving person, while I am a judging person. Again, this sometimes causes a little difficulty in understanding between us. For instance, he doesn't care quite so much about order and tidiness as I do. But that's okay, because we respect each other's feelings and thoughts. And we try to understand each other as well as possible. Our differences bring us together. They don't tear us apart.