ESFP Relationships

ESFPs are social, fun-loving, free-spirited people who live life in the moment and squeeze every little bit of excitement from everything. Naturally, they don’t spare any of this freshness and energy when dating. For people with the ESFP personality type, relationships aren’t about slowly building foundations for the future, or planning out a life – they are bubbling, unpredictable things to be enjoyed for as long as there’s enjoyment to be had.

Here Today, Gone Tomorrow

Of course, when that enjoyment does burn out, it’s gone. ESFPs reevaluate their situations and commitments constantly, regardless of professions of love and dedication today. If a week later they just don’t feel the same, that’s it, and ESFP personalities have no problem seriously considering breaking things off. While ESFPs can be willing to work on their relationships rather than swap them out, it takes a great deal of maturity and experience for them to realize that it can be worth the bother.

While they do last though, relationships with ESFPs are simply unforgettable. People with this personality type always have some new and exciting activity up their sleeves, and they genuinely enjoy spending each moment with their partners. ESFPs enjoy physical intimacy immensely, and they prove themselves affectionate, inquisitive, and open-minded lovers who love to share pleasure with willing and reciprocative partners.

ESFP romantic relationships

Conversation with ESFPs is similar, focusing on fun, sometimes quirky subjects rather than deep, soul-searching expressions. The past and the future, the sciences and politics, and long-term plans and commitments are all routinely ignored by ESFP personalities. They slow things down and add too much weight to ESFPs’ freewheeling style.

ESFPs happily chat about just about anything or anyone that comes to mind, but won’t have a topic forced.

Highly emotional people, and sensitive, ESFPs respond poorly to outside "suggestions" on how to manage their love lives. They respond even worse if criticisms come from their partners, and trying to take emotions out of the picture by telling ESFPs to "not take this personally" isn’t helpful either. Handling these situations better is a definite area for improvement for ESFPs, as there are entire dating strategies (pretty distasteful, manipulative ones) that revolve around exploiting this very trait.

On the other hand, the issue can be a lack of criticism at all. ESFPs value social input a lot, and are almost as affected by their friends’ opinions of their dating partners as their own. Since ESFPs are attracted to people who share their attitudes, whether dating partners or friends, this can leave them in an echo chamber that only tells them what they want to hear, reinforcing immature behaviors.

Just Trying to Find Somebody to Love

All of these tendencies can really come back to haunt people with the ESFP personality type later on. ESFPs’ tendency to avoid promises and commitments and jump from partner to partner sabotages necessary long-term goals like retirement planning. Building real relationships takes time and conscious effort. This makes Introverted (I) and Judging (J) partners (who preferably share the Observant [S] trait) very rewarding partners, as they help ESFPs to develop a sense of introspection, as well as some healthy stability and reliability.

Luckily, ESFPs are incredibly likeable people who enjoy life’s small pleasures, and hardly want for diversity in their partners. Enthusiastic and affectionate, with a pure and down-to-earth love that just takes things at face value, ESFPs are fortunate that they take the time to find someone they truly enjoy being with every day, rather than settling too soon for stability over happiness, only to lose both.

4 weeks ago
This is so true about me when it comes to relationships
1 year ago
Friendship is the best thing in the life .Life without friendship is worthless ,I love the formation of friendship with many
Alfie Pickering
3 years ago
Thank you, I feel I understand myself better now and my relationship with men
3 years ago
True. My relationships never lasts for more than a couple of months, since I always get bored of my partners. However, for the first time, I am dating an (I) Introverted person who's very attentive and caring. We've been over a year now, and I have a feeling that this time, it'll last.
3 years ago
Good luck! ;) Hope it will ;)
1 year ago
Hey Joyce I hope everything goes well still in your relationship but tell me please, how is it possible that you are with Introverted person? I mean, I can't imagine that in my case as I can go everywhere and be with people... But yeah... I'm 27 and still a single... :(
4 years ago
WOW, mom took this test and it is so spot on, in a good way.
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