Being a Turbulent Architect (INTJ-T) doesn’t automatically make a person frugal, but in my case, it probably influences how I spend time and money. For example, when I’m out shopping, I like to operate with a narrow purpose, and the quicker (and cheaper) I complete the mission and return home, the better. But when my partner and I are out together, one question always seems to come up: Should we stop and get a bite?
My answer is usually something like, “We have food at home,” but my snack-positive partner usually overcomes my grumbling resistance by offering to buy me some food. It’s basic bribery, and it works – she gets the food foray she wants, and I’m rendered willing because my expenditure is reduced to time spent. But even with a tasty bribe, it often takes some effort to convince me (and overcome the siren call of home).
Of course, successfully convincing different personality types can require different approaches (although offering to foot the bill is a solid foundation). Can you appeal to your partner’s personality traits to persuade them to get a tasty treat when you’re out together? In the half-serious spirit of fun, I say, Yes, you can…regardless of who buys. Let’s consider some approaches to convince each personality type.
Analyst Personality Types
Given their insightful way of assessing and categorizing things, you might convince Architects (INTJs) by inviting them to judge a food. “Supposedly that place has the best falafel in town. I think we should rate it for ourselves, instead of assuming that anyone else knows what they’re talking about.”
Considering their love of knowledge and theory, you might convince Logicians (INTPs) by posing a rational experiment. “It would be interesting to try that expensive place, just to see how it compares to more value-oriented foods. How good can it really be? It might be worth knowing.”
Given their decisive and creative mindset, you might convince Commanders (ENTJs) by asking for a demonstration of their competence. “You seem to possess significant snacking acumen, but can you provide tangible evidence? Introduce me to what you consider the best pasta in town.”
In light of their feisty intellect, you might convince Debaters (ENTPs) by challenging their preferences and abilities. “I wonder if your taste buds are good enough to identify three kinds of ice cream blended into one mystery combo shake? Are you brave enough to try something new?”
Diplomat Personality Types
Keeping in mind their heartfelt sense of idealism, you might convince Advocates (INFJs) by appealing to their humanity and kindness. “Look at those kids working so hard. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to validate their efforts by ordering a couple of deluxe sandwiches and giving them a nice big tip?”
Considering their endless imagination, you might convince Mediators (INFPs) through their sense of hopeful curiosity. “I wonder if crepes are as good with a savory filling as with a sweet filling? And what’s the best filling? We might have to try them all to see.”
Given their vision and sense of community, you might convince Protagonists (ENFJs) by presenting an inspiring future picture. “If that seafood place is any good, we could invite [mutual friends] and have a fun night out sometime soon. But we’d better make sure it’s good…”
Because of their joyful sense of spontaneity, you might convince Campaigners (ENFPs) by springing your idea on them with sudden enthusiasm. “Oh my gosh! You know what we need? Tacos! Wouldn’t this day be even more amazing with tacos?”
Sentinel Personality Types
Since they often love rational practicality, you might convince Logisticians (ISTJs) using blatant, direct logic. “I feel my mental alertness and physical comfort degrading. Some Thai noodles would provide the sustenance I need to maintain adequate performance.”
In light of their love for cohesion and personal connections, you might convince Defenders (ISFJs) by creating a cozy, calm moment that you can share. “We should get some hot, gooey cinnamon buns and find a quiet place to take a break and just sit together.”
Because they tend to favor organized planning, you might convince Executives (ESTJs) by suggesting something in advance and letting them schedule it. “Some classic hot dogs with all the toppings would be a fun, retro treat. What time would work best to enjoy them today?”
Due to their social drive and sense of duty, you might convince Consuls (ESFJs) by secretly arranging a third-party invite that they’ll be tempted to accept. “Hey, [names of some friends you’re in cahoots with] said they’ll be at the doughnut shop soon and want to meet up! It would be rude to disappoint them.”
Explorer Personality Types
Since they often love tinkering with projects, you might convince Virtuosos (ISTPs) to go someplace with a menu of highly customizable items. “Wow, that place lets you build your own pizza and choose among fifty different toppings! How can we resist the chance to personalize to perfection?”
Given their open-mindedness and in-the-moment mindset, you might convince Adventurers (ISFPs) to try something unfamiliar that sounds good. “I’ve always wanted to experience [whatever’s new to both of you] cuisine. Wouldn’t it be fun to sample something completely new?”
Because they often regard social prestige favorably, you might convince Entrepreneurs (ESTPs) to visit an eatery by portraying it as an important place to be. “I heard that [whatever kinds of people you think are important] love going there. Supposedly it’s getting to be super popular with [those important people].”
Considering their adaptable, heartfelt zest for life, you don’t have to do much to convince Entertainers (ESFPs), except wait till hunger sets in and then make your preferences known in bright, cheerful terms – chances are, they’ll get on board. “Hey, food… Let’s eat!”
But Seriously…
I’m being lighthearted here and not suggesting that you pester your partner to buy you anything. In fact, it can feel just as good to treat them as to ask for a treat, so why not share that gifting fun back and forth? Of course, the above are just examples. What treat would you most like your special someone to get for you, and how would you convince them? Let us know in the comments below!