INTP Relationships

When it comes to romantic relationships, INTPs have an interesting mixture of traits that often pleasantly surprise their partners. People with this personality type are always full of ideas, but they have few opportunities to explore their more romantic notions. As with any of their theories, INTPs love sharing with others, and in finally meeting someone where romantic thoughts are appropriate, they show themselves to be excited, enthusiastic, and even playful, flirting with word-play and intellectual games.

None of this is to say that these relationships come easily to INTPs – they are shy and withdrawn individuals, and getting out and meeting new people, risking rejection and making themselves the center of attention in emotionally delicate situations are far from being their strengths. It is more likely that INTP personalities will leave a trail of breadcrumbs for a potential partner, allowing them to make the first move and committing to their partner as an act of reciprocation rather than bravado.

Marry! A Good Wife Makes Happiness, A Bad One, Philosophy

From the start, INTPs take their relationships seriously – their imagination and vision, and the challenge of getting to know new people, make them all too aware of how important it is that they’re involved with someone, and they will prove themselves surprisingly loyal. Even early in the dating phase, INTPs are unusually direct and honest, doing their best to express their mindset and create mutual understanding, believing that this shared knowledge will help to minimize misunderstandings and avoid conflict.

As their relationships progress, INTPs’ daily needs prove remarkably simple. Gifts, surprises, complex social plans and date nights are all fairly unimportant to people with the INTP personality type, but this is also one of their chiefest weaknesses – their partner may very much need these things, and it won’t even occur to INTPs to plan them out. For all their analysis and attempts at mutual understanding, INTPs are notoriously bad at picking up on others’ emotional needs.

INTP romantic relationships
When it comes to conflict, there is a certain willful ignorance for INTPs, and they often set aside their partners’ feelings, and their own, for far too long.

When these conflicts do arise and are inescapable, INTPs will do their best to find a logical solution. But this hardly helps if the problem is logic itself, that INTP personalities aren’t meeting their partners’ emotional needs. INTPs should keep this in mind, and try to meet their partners halfway by communicating on an emotional level – if they make this effort, understanding partners will recognize and appreciate the gesture, clumsy though it may be. After all, they need to afford INTPs the same benefit, and meet them halfway with logic and simplicity as well.

Beware the Barrenness of a Busy Life

All this material asceticism and conflict avoidance support one primary goal – to free up mental resources for more important things. INTPs’ creative, vivid imagination make for a surprisingly enthusiastic, passionate, and romantic partner. While INTPs may prioritize their inner world too much, imagining interesting and exciting intimate situations that are never expressed to their partners, they also use this rich inner world to achieve as much as possible in intimacy – they rarely want for ideas.

Physically, intellectually and with a little effort emotionally, INTP relationships are rich and rewarding connections. Partners who share the Intuitive (N) trait are usually best, along with one or two opposite traits to create variety and balance, but so long as INTPs remember that they are with people who have their own, independent wants and needs, and so long as their partners remember the same of their INTPs, these are long-lasting and satisfying relationships.

2 months ago
I cannot thank you enough. After constantly feeling inadequate for so long, as people around me don't seem to get me, this piece is most welcoming. It's also fantastic that the individual report is practical in that it covers career, family, etc. This is gold!
1 year ago
So our greatest strengths are our greatest weaknesses... welp
Wolfy
1 year ago
This is spot on. I was surprized anything could read people's emotions and throughts so well
Anonymous
1 year ago
Yeah, this describes my significant other almost too well. "Even early in the dating phase, INTPs are unusually direct and honest" that was spot on. Some of it is making me laugh, with a bit of salt. "Gifts, surprises, complex social plans and date nights are all fairly unimportant to people with the INTP personality type, but this is also one of their chiefest weaknesses – their partner may very much need these things, and it won't even occur to INTPs to plan them out. " Not too long ago Xmas was around the corner and we both got lazy about presents (I would say he was lazy for the first two years and then I gave up half way through). The other part is making me realize, that it may not work out in the end. He said that it was hard to understand empathy. To which my dismay, I was bewildered and felt like he was making up excuses. This writing has confirmed the emotional disconnection. And then there was this "communicating on an emotional level – if they make this effort, understanding partners will recognize and appreciate the gesture, clumsy though it may be. " He makes the effort, and though very clumsy, I do in the end appreciate it.
Anonymous
1 year ago
I realise that this seems random, but is nobody going to talk about the Iron Man suit and the little droid that drives around the Death Star hallways in that picture??
2 months ago
There's also the Diamond Dogs logo from MGS V in the corner! I don't know how many others noticed this or identified it. I think it's cool!
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