One might think that the blustery and flighty nature of Debaters would make parenting a particular challenge for them, and in many ways, they’d be right. However, one thing people with the Debater personality type love more than just about anything is a good challenge, a problem to fix, even if it comes to addressing their own weaknesses. Debaters take their roles as parents seriously, and they are bound to be affected profoundly by this development in their lives – if anyone is able to take an outside influence, like their children, and use that influence to address their own faults, it is Debaters.
Raising Free Thinkers
From the beginning Debaters’ distaste for rules and regulations is evident, and they are likely to give their young children the freedom necessary to explore on their own. Independence is one of Debaters’ greatest needs, and they feel that no person is complete without an independent mind.
As their children grow and develop, Debaters encourage them to think independently and voice objections, opinions and alternatives. But unlike Diplomat parents, who encourage their children to express their thoughts in terms of feelings and needs, Debaters teach their children to approach these options from a position of impartiality and logic, to state what is more effective rather than what would make them feel good. As in other relationships, this quality of emotional inaccessibility is where Debaters struggle.
As their children grow into adolescence and learn to find a balance in healthy emotional expression, people with the Debater personality type may find themselves exasperated. While always up for a good debate on just about any subject, Debaters often need their partners’ help in managing more emotional outbursts and arguments. Debaters are more able than most, but even they have their limits and rules when it comes to vocal conflict.
Finding a Better Way
Luckily, Debater personalities recognize what’s at stake: they want their children to grow into smart, independent, honest adults. To convey those values, Debaters know that they need, like with any other debate, to communicate in terms that are accessible to all sides. If that means learning how to use the tools of emotional expression and appeals, and in so doing becoming more emotionally expressive in real, personal terms as well, so be it.