There are different ways to deal with conflict in the workplace. Learn about the five conflict resolution styles and when to use each one for the best results.
What’s Coming Up
- What Are the 5 Conflict Resolution Styles?
- 1. The Competing Style: Standing Your Ground
- 2. The Accommodating Style: Meeting Others Halfway
- 3. The Avoiding Style: Strategic Withdrawal
- 4. The Collaborating Style: Creating Win-Win Solutions
- 5. The Compromising Style: Finding Middle Ground
- Using Personality Insights for Better Conflict Resolution
- Applying Conflict Resolution Styles Effectively
- Frequently Asked Questions
- Further Reading
What Are the 5 Conflict Resolution Styles?
We all have our own conflict resolution style and our own ways of dealing with workplace conflict. Have you ever wondered why some people immediately push back during disagreements while others seem to disappear when things get tense? Or why some colleagues always look for win-win solutions while others give in quickly?
A conflict resolution style is how you handle disagreements. It shows how you balance your needs with the needs of others.
The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument is a tool created by Kenneth W. Thomas and Ralph H. Kilmann. It helps to distinguish between five conflict resolution styles. They are the competing, accommodating, avoiding, collaborating, and compromising styles.
Each of the five conflict resolution styles uses different levels of assertiveness and cooperation. Assertiveness refers to how strongly you stand up for your own needs and interests. Cooperation is the extent to which you try to meet the needs and interests of the other person.
An effective conflict resolution strategy requires an understanding of these five distinct styles to handle disagreements. Each style works best in certain situations. Mastering these styles can transform workplace conflicts from potential disasters into opportunities for growth.
Let’s look at the following details for each conflict resolution style:
- Key characteristics
- When it works best
- An example of it
- Possible problems that it can cause
- Tips for how to use it
- Signs that it’s being overused
No single style is universally “right.” The key is to be flexible and adapt based on the situation.
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1. The Competing Style: Standing Your Ground
The competing style – sometimes referred to as the forcing style – represents a highly assertive and uncooperative approach. This is when you stick firmly to your position, even when others disagree. This style puts your goals ahead of relationships.
Characteristics
Someone who uses the competing style will typically:
- Focus on winning or achieving goals
- Rely on direct communication, often with no compromise
- Tend to make quick decisions
When to Use This Style
The competing style is most effective in situations that involve any of the following circumstances:
- You need to take quick action.
- You must make necessary but unpopular changes.
- You’re dealing with people who take advantage of others.
- An important issue demands tough choices.
- An emergency requires you to take immediate action.
An Example of This Style
Imagine a cybersecurity breach that requires a company’s computer systems to be shut down right away. A tech leader might make this decision even though sales teams are in the middle of client meetings. Here, the competing style serves the greater good, despite the short-term relationship strain that it may create.
Potential Pitfalls
While effective in certain situations, overuse of this conflict resolution style can lead to some negative results:
- Damaged work relationships
- Employees who are afraid to speak up
- Negative feelings among team members
- Reduced teamwork in the future
- A hostile work environment
Tips for Using This Style
These strategies can help you obtain better results with the competing style of conflict resolution:
- Choose your battles: Save this style for truly important issues.
- Explain your reasons: Share why you’re taking your position.
- Recognize the impact: Demonstrate that you understand that your decisions affect others.
- Follow up: Rebuild any damaged relationships after the conflict is resolved.
Signs You’re Overusing This Conflict Resolution Style
While this conflict resolution style has its place, if you rely on it too heavily, you may notice the following issues:
- Coworkers avoid bringing you problems.
- Team members seem afraid to disagree with you.
- You often find yourself in arguments.
- Your relationships with others feel strained.
2. The Accommodating Style: Meeting Others Halfway
The accommodating style is a highly cooperative but not assertive way of handling conflict. It means putting aside your own concerns to meet others’ needs.
Characteristics
If you adopt the accommodating style, you will likely:
- Focus on keeping relationships healthy
- Be willing to give up your personal interests
- Strive to keep the peace
When to Use This Style
You may find the accommodating conflict resolution style particularly effective in circumstances where at least one of the following statements is true:
- The issue matters more to the other party.
- Keeping harmony is more valuable than winning.
- It’s important to build up goodwill for future interactions.
- You have realized that you’re wrong.
- The cost of fighting exceeds the benefit of winning.
An Example of This Style
Consider a senior manager who accepts a junior team member’s approach to a project, despite having different ideas. They see this as a chance for the junior member to grow and gain confidence. Such a manager puts long-term development ahead of short-term preferences.
Potential Pitfalls
Overreliance on the accommodating style can lead you to experience the following problems:
- Having less influence at work
- Receiving less respect from your coworkers
- Having to let important issues go unaddressed
- Feeling frustration and resentment
- Being taken advantage of by more assertive colleagues
Tips for Using This Style
This conflict resolution style is best utilized with the following suggestions in mind:
- Set boundaries: Know when to stop accommodating.
- Keep track: Notice the give-and-take in key relationships.
- Communicate: Let others know when you’re giving in.
- Choose carefully: Actively decide when to accommodate others.
Signs You’re Overusing This Conflict Resolution Style
While this conflict resolution style has definite advantages, if you use it too often, you may notice the following:
- You often feel taken advantage of.
- Your important needs go unmet.
- You frequently feel resentful.
- Others increasingly make demands of you.
- Your ideas rarely get used.
3. The Avoiding Style: Strategic Withdrawal
The avoiding style is low in assertiveness and in cooperation. It means stepping back from or delaying dealing with conflict. While often seen as passive, avoiding can sometimes be a smart choice in handling conflict.
Characteristics
Often, if you’re using the avoiding style, you will:
- Delay or sidestep issues
- Withdraw from threatening situations
- Prefer indirect approaches
When to Use This Style
The avoiding conflict resolution style is most appropriate when at least one of these statements is true:
- The issue is minor or temporary.
- The harm of confrontation would outweigh the benefits.
- You need more time to gather information.
- Others can resolve the conflict better.
- A cooling-off period would be helpful.
An Example of This Style
Imagine an HR manager who notices a small amount of tension between two team members during a big project deadline. Rather than stepping in right away, they choose to watch the situation. They recognize that the stress is temporary and that getting involved might make things worse.
Potential Pitfalls
Excessive use of the avoiding style can result in these issues:
- Unresolved issues that grow bigger
- Missed chances for meaningful resolution
- Decreased trust and openness between team members
- Growing resentment among the team
- People seeing you as uninvolved or uncaring
Tips for Using This Style
These pieces of advice can help you avoid the potential pitfalls of this conflict resolution style:
- Set time limits: Decide when you’ll revisit avoided issues.
- Track concerns: Note patterns that might need future attention.
- Explain your choice: When appropriate, tell others why you’re withdrawing from the resolution process.
- Plan next steps: Develop a plan for eventually addressing the issue.
Signs You’re Overusing This Conflict Resolution Style
If you rely on this conflict resolution style too often, you may be faced with these negative outcomes:
- Small problems regularly become crises.
- Team members stop asking for your input.
- You feel increasingly isolated at work.
- Important decisions get made without you.
- Your stress increases due to unresolved issues.
4. The Collaborating Style: Creating Win-Win Solutions
The collaborating style is highly assertive and highly cooperative. It means diving deep into conflicts to find solutions that satisfy everyone’s concerns. Think of it as creative problem-solving that turns conflicts into chances for innovation and mutual gain.
Characteristics
Those who embrace the collaborating style tend to:
- Focus on both goals and relationships
- Explore underlying interests
- Invest in long-term solutions
When to Use This Style
The collaborating style is an effective style when at least one of these conditions are met:
- Both the issue and relationships are important.
- There’s enough time for thorough problem-solving.
- It’s a complex situation that requires creative solutions.
- All parties involved are willing to participate.
- Learning from others’ insights would be valuable.
An Example of This Style
A marketing director and a finance manager disagree about the budget. Instead of compromising, they work together to analyze departmental needs, market opportunities, and fiscal constraints. Together, they develop an innovative funding model that supports marketing while maintaining financial discipline.
Potential Pitfalls
While powerful, the collaborating style can have drawbacks, as it tends to:
- Take a lot of time and energy
- Be overkill for simple issues
- Require openness from all parties involved
- Frustrate those wanting quick solutions
- Depend on good communication skills
Tips for Using This Style
These suggestions can help you use this conflict resolution style effectively:
- Make time: Schedule enough time for collaborative discussions.
- Ask questions: Dig deep to understand each party’s underlying interests.
- Welcome new ideas: Be open to unusual solutions.
- Build skills: Work on your active listening and facilitation abilities.
Signs You’re Overusing This Conflict Resolution Style
While this method of resolving conflicts can work out great, it can also result in unintended complications. You may wish to switch methods if the following problems start to occur:
- Simple issues become unnecessarily complex.
- Decisions take too long.
- Team members feel overwhelmed by endless discussions.
- Urgent matters don’t get resolved in a timely manner.
- Other work gets neglected as team members seek perfect solutions.
5. The Compromising Style: Finding Middle Ground
The compromising style involves a moderate level of both assertiveness and cooperation. It means finding middle-ground solutions where each party gets some of what they want. Think of it as meeting halfway – not ideal for either party, but acceptable to both.
Characteristics
Someone using the compromising style will usually:
- Focus on finding acceptable rather than perfect solutions
- Trade concessions for agreements
- Emphasize fairness and practicality
When to Use This Style
The compromising style works best when any of these specific criteria are met:
- Time constraints prevent full collaboration.
- Two equally powerful parties are at a standstill.
- Temporary solutions are needed.
- Backup approaches will be needed if collaboration fails.
- The issue is moderately important.
An Example of This Style
Two department heads compete for limited office space after a hiring surge. Neither can get their ideal arrangement, so they agree to split the difference. One gets their preferred location but less space, while the other gets more space but in a less ideal location.
Potential Pitfalls
Compromising comes with certain risks, as it could:
- Result in half measures that satisfy no one
- Become a default approach that prevents better solutions
- Encourage playing games and bargaining
- Cause more creative possibilities to be overlooked
- Lead to cynicism if overused
Tips for Using This Style
If you want to use this conflict resolution style, we recommend these approaches:
- Start high: Begin with your ideal position to leave room for movement.
- Know your limits: Decide what you can’t give up.
- Focus on fairness: Make sure that trades feel equal.
- Stay flexible: Be ready to adjust your approach.
Signs You’re Overusing This Conflict Resolution Style
Being overly dependent on the compromising style often results in the following issues:
- Creative solutions are rarely explored.
- Splitting the difference becomes your go-to approach.
- Innovation is hampered.
- Important priorities get inadequate resources.
- Decisions feel average rather than excellent.
Using Personality Insights for Better Conflict Resolution
Understanding conflict resolution styles and knowing when to use each one can turn you from a good manager into a great one. And with insights into how personality type affects these styles, you gain an even deeper ability to handle workplace conflicts.
Personality Roles and Conflict Resolution Styles
Different personality Roles tend to prefer different conflict resolution styles:
- Analysts (personality types with the Intuitive and Thinking traits): Analysts often default to the competing style. They prefer logical arguments and objective decision-making. Their focus on rationality makes them excellent at standing firm when necessary, though they may need to consciously consider emotional aspects of conflicts.
- Diplomats (personality types with the Intuitive and Feeling traits): Diplomats typically lean toward the collaborative style. They combine their creative problem-solving with strong empathy. Their ability to understand multiple perspectives makes them naturals at finding win-win solutions.
- Sentinels (personality types with the Observant and Judging traits): Sentinels frequently employ the compromising style. They value practical solutions and established procedures. Their dedication to finding workable solutions makes them excellent at reaching balanced agreements.
- Explorers (personality types with the Observant and Prospecting traits): Explorers may initially gravitate toward the avoiding style. They like to step back and assess situations before engaging. Their quick adaptability allows them to shift approaches as needed, making them responsive conflict managers once they choose to engage.
Applying Personality Insights
Once you understand both conflict resolution styles and personality types, you can use these insights to manage workplace conflicts better. This approach combines theory with practice, transforming conflict management across your organization. You can achieve this by following these steps:
- Know your personality type: First, take our free personality test to understand whether your personality type is classified as an Analyst, Diplomat, Sentinel, or Explorer. This insight will help you understand your natural tendencies in dealing with conflict.
- Identify your default style: Think about your typical conflict management style. Which of the five conflict resolution styles do you use most often? Then compare this to what you know about your personality type’s typical approach. Are you following your type’s natural tendency? Have you developed different patterns?
- Read your audience: Develop your ability to spot different personality patterns in others. Watch how your colleagues approach problems, make decisions, and interact with the team. Do they lead with logic or emotion? Do they seek quick resolutions or prefer to explore different options?
- Bridge the gaps: Use your understanding of both your own tendencies and others’ preferences to consciously choose your approach. If you’re an Analyst personality dealing with a Diplomat personality type, you might need to acknowledge the emotional aspects of the conflict before diving into logical solutions. If you’re a Sentinel personality working with an Explorer personality type, you might need to allow time for flexibility within your practical framework.
This deeper understanding of personality theory can transform how you choose your conflict resolution style. The key is remaining flexible and being willing to adapt your approach to both the situation and the personalities involved.
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Applying Conflict Resolution Styles Effectively
Understanding the five conflict resolution styles is just the beginning. The real skill lies in knowing when and how to use each one effectively. Think of them as tools in your leadership toolbox – each is designed for specific situations and challenges.
Finding Your Balance
The goal isn’t to master just one conflict resolution style. Your natural style might not always be the best way to handle a particular conflict. The most effective leaders can adapt their approach based on a variety of factors, such as:
- The importance of the issue
- Time constraints
- Power dynamics
- The personalities and parties involved
- Implications for long-term relationships
Moving Forward
As you develop your conflict resolution skills and practice conflict resolution styles, consider these questions:
- Which style feels most natural to you?
- Which style do you tend to avoid?
- How do your team members respond to different styles?
- What situations trigger you to rely on your default style?
You can use your answers to these questions to increase your self-awareness and identify areas for growth in your conflict resolution approach.
Effective conflict resolution isn’t about avoiding conflict at all costs. The better approach is to handle conflict in ways that strengthen relationships and improve outcomes. Each style has its place, and true mastery comes from knowing when and how to use each one. Like a skilled musician who can play multiple instruments, the best leaders can shift between conflict resolution styles as the situation demands.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a conflict resolution style?
A conflict resolution style is the approach that you use to handle disagreements with others. It reflects how you balance your own needs with the needs of others who are involved in the conflict.
What is the best conflict resolution style?
There is no single “best” conflict resolution style, because each situation calls for a different approach. The most effective leaders can adapt their style based on the specific circumstances of each conflict.
How can I improve my conflict resolution skills?
You can improve your conflict resolution skills by learning all five conflict resolution styles, practicing active listening, and asking for feedback after conflicts are resolved. Taking time to reflect on past conflicts can help you handle future conflicts better.
Can conflict ever be positive in the workplace?
Yes, conflict can be positive when it brings different viewpoints to light and leads to better solutions. When handled well, workplace conflict can spark innovation and strengthen team relationships. We dive into how you can achieve this in our article “Conflict Resolution Strategies: A Comprehensive Guide for Workplace Leaders.”