Having (and Being) Fun at Holiday Parties Part II: Introverts
If you haven’t read the first part of this article, it would be a good idea to check it out before proceeding. In this second part, we’ll resume where we left off, touching briefly on the party attitudes of each personality type and offering some quick tips to help you enjoy socializing this holiday season.
We’ve already covered the Extraverted personality types, so let’s pick up with the Introverts. Think Introverts don’t like to party? Think again...
Focused Festiveness: Architects (INTJ) and Logisticians (ISTJ)
If Architects and Logisticians are picky about how they party, it’s because Introversion and the Judging trait make them socially selective. And while the Thinking trait helps them relate well to others on an intellectual level, these personalities aren’t as quick to form emotional connections, especially with new people. But they love to party hard when things are just so – they really like what they like.
What to bring to the party: You. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. You might not be the most socially adept person in the room, but you’ll connect when the moment is right and the person is interesting. When you hit that point, head for whatever makes you happiest: the kitchen, the DJ, whatever. Get your feet under you first and then branch out. Don’t hang out only with your friends – remember, they were once all strangers too.
What to leave at home: Dismissal. You needn’t pretend to like something you don’t, but at least try it for real before blowing it off. The fun is out there, and like Agent Mulder of The X-Files, you must “want to believe.” If you aren’t excited to party, tap into your friends’ energy and tag along. Give it your all. It’s okay to firmly know what you like, but don’t limit yourself to only liking what you already know.
- Be social. Let your friends take you out.
- Find the fun. Wherever you are, find some aspect you like and start there.
- Meet people. Just start chatting with a big smile – fake it till you make it.
Mellow Yet Merry: Advocates (INFJ) and Defenders (ISFJ)
Advocates and Defenders love sharing fun, but their vibrancy often takes a little time to emerge. Their Introversion doesn’t always give them a lot of social drive, and the Judging personality trait makes them most comfortable in familiar surroundings. But with their Feeling trait, they’re surprisingly good at – and enjoy – making cheerful connections with people. It’s a perfect reason to party.
What to bring to the party: Sincerity. You might not always feel like you dazzle a room, but your warm authenticity will charm all the right people. Anyone who’s not interested in friendly earnestness can take a hike. Show your lightness of being – it’s not unbearable. Oh, and commit yourself to trying something new every time you go out, whether it’s a food or connecting with an unfamiliar person.
What to leave at home: Concern. Avoid worrying about what people think of you, judging others, and feeling an overactive sense of responsibility – you can reprioritize your worthy sense of concern a bit when you’re in party mode. Loosening up or dropping a few boundaries for a while won’t turn you into a bad person. Although you can be particular (and feelings of annoyance are often understandable), laugh off anything less than a broken foot. Heck, laugh that off too – after all, it’s the best medicine.
- Be authentic. Welcome good reactions, and shrug off the rest.
- Open up. Try to go with the moment – some fun can’t be predicted.
- Don’t fuss. Put your energy into fun, not planning and perfecting.
Curious Celebrants: Mediators (INFP) and Adventurers (ISFP)
While quiet at times, Mediators and Adventurers love to explore and understand people, places, and things – such as a good party. Their Introversion doesn’t create much desire for constant social activity, but their Prospecting trait keeps them hungry for fun new experiences. If these personalities can share some laughs, they will, since their Feeling trait opens the door for warm and joyful connections with others – an awesome party skill.
What to bring to the party: Curiosity. You may not be one to boldly direct a group, but you’re likely one of the first to say yes when something sounds fun. Let your spontaneous lightheartedness wash over the more reluctant revelers around you. Help others say yes to fun by being a positive example and making wise choices. And be timely – it’s more fun to be with you than to wait for you.
What to leave at home: Sensitivity. If a party is a sea, then there are inevitably going to be waves and occasional jutting rocks in the form of jerks and unhappy situations. Don’t let yourself be bashed or abashed – just navigate in the clear. Your personality traits enable you to make rapid attitude adjustments, when you decide to. Surround yourself with a resilient emotional raft that turns the stormy bits into a water-park ride, away to happy shores.
- Say yes. You’re naturally curious – find that fun and point it out to others.
- Steer your ship. Go with the flow – but not over the edge of a waterfall.
- Stay positive. You can adapt to any situation wonderfully – try to stick only to the worthy ones.
Exploring Excitement: Logicians (INTP) and Virtuosos (ISTP)
Logicians and Virtuosos think nothing of plunging into whatever interests them, and when their interests are social, they love to experiment with experiences. Their Introversion and the Thinking trait give them a thoughtful approach, as if they have fun with their heads as much as their hearts. But fun in any form makes a party, and with their Prospecting personality trait, they’re always interested in discovering what’s next.
What to bring to the party: An open mind. Connecting with people on a personal level likely isn’t a major focus for you most of the time, and that’s cool... most of the time. But this is a party. You excel at exploring, so make a social occasion a chance to explore being social. Your mind is just waiting to spark a fun conversation. Be excited to share what you know and learn what others have to offer.
What to leave at home: Disinterest. It’s easy to get bored when your mind always thirsts for something novel – and it’s okay to be a lively gadabout. But consider staying put for a while. Sometimes things seem shallow because you haven’t gone deep enough yet. Find the fun wherever you are by accepting and adapting. If you must change scenes, be considerate of other people as you enter and exit the flow.
- Be social. Have fun with people, not just near them.
- Share your mind. It will find fans.
- Stick around. Give fun a chance to develop before skipping out.
And Out We Go...
The above tips are based broadly on our research into personality types, but individual people of any type are wonderfully unique, and your experiences may differ. We do hope that these meaningful ideas fire up your thoughts on how you can have a very good time. Even the deepest habits can be shed for a night, like a coat on the way to the dance floor.
While certain tips were provided for certain types, we’d like to emphasize that they’re all worth consideration, no matter who you are. Without encumbering yourself, putting a little thought into how you get down can go a long way toward a successful shindig. Fun is often a choice, and it’s hard to have a bad party when people decide that mutual enjoyment is the main goal. Whether you and your crew roll upscale urban or backyard bonfire, please have a very joyful and safe holiday party season.
Do you have a secret “pocket pack” you bring along to soirees that helps you make the most of them? Leave a message in the comments below!
If you’d like to learn more about ways you can use your personality traits to your best social advantage, follow these links!