How to Improve Your Emotional Awareness

Developing emotional awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence. Learn how to go from vague feelings to emotional clarity with tools you can start using today.

What’s Coming Up

• What Is Emotional Awareness?
• What Are the 5 Levels of Emotional Awareness?
• Personality and Emotional Awareness
• How to Improve Emotional Awareness
• Taking the Next Step on Your Emotional Journey
• Frequently Asked Questions
• Further Reading

What Is Emotional Awareness?

Imagine you’re scrolling through social media when you stumble upon a post announcing your friend’s exciting new job – the same position you recently applied for but didn’t get. Your heart drops as your thumb hovers uncertainly over the like button.

In this moment, can you pinpoint exactly what you’re feeling? Can you separate the warmth of genuine happiness for your friend from the sting of disappointment, the twinge of envy, and perhaps a hint of shame about those conflicting emotions?

Emotional awareness is your ability to recognize and identify emotions – both your own and those of others. It involves developing a finely tuned sensitivity to the emotional experiences that color your life, allowing you to:

• Notice when an emotion is present
• Distinguish between different emotional states
• Label these emotions with accurate, specific vocabulary
• Recognize when you’re experiencing multiple (and sometimes contradictory) feelings at the same time

Think of emotional awareness as the foundation upon which broader emotional intelligence is built.

While emotional intelligence encompasses understanding why emotions arise and how to manage them effectively, emotional awareness is specifically about recognizing and identifying specific emotions. This is the essential first step in developing a healthier relationship with your emotional life.

To get a sense of where you’re starting from before we dive deeper into emotional awareness and emotional intelligence, consider these questions:

• Can you identify subtle emotional shifts throughout your day, or do you only notice strong feelings?
• Can you name your emotions beyond just “good” or “bad”?
• Can you recognize when you’re experiencing multiple emotions at once, even when they seem contradictory?

If you found yourself unsure about some of these questions, don’t worry. Most of us grow up without receiving a formal education on emotions or how to name them accurately.

Thankfully, emotional awareness is a skill that can be cultivated at any age.

What Are the 5 Levels of Emotional Awareness?

Think of emotional awareness like learning a language. Some of us know just a few basic words while others have a rich vocabulary.

Research by psychologists Richard Lane and Ryan Smith found that emotional awareness typically develops through five levels. These five levels represent a journey from simply feeling emotions in our bodies to fully understanding the rich complexity of our emotional lives.

Let’s take a closer look at each level to better understand just how complex our emotional experience can be.

Level 1: Physical Sensations

At this level, emotions are experienced primarily as sensations in the body without being connected to specific feelings.

You might notice your heart pounding, muscles tensing, or stomach fluttering, but struggle to identify these as emotional responses.

Level 2: Action Tendencies

Here, emotions appear as impulses or urges to act in certain ways.

Rather than naming your emotions, you might describe wanting to escape a situation, lash out, or withdraw.

You might also describe feeling vaguely “good” or “bad” without further differentiation.

Level 3: Single Emotions

At this level, you can identify and label specific emotions, but you generally experience them one at a time and often in simple terms.

You might recognize “I feel angry” or “I’m sad,” but these emotions are experienced as singular states rather than as part of a more complex emotional landscape.

Level 4: Mixed Emotions

At level 4, you can recognize that multiple, sometimes contradictory emotions can exist at the same time.

You might understand that you feel both nervous and excited about a presentation, or simultaneously disappointed about an outcome, yet grateful for what you learned.

This level involves more emotional nuance and the ability to hold seemingly opposite feelings at once.

Level 5: Complex Emotional Awareness

This highest level involves recognizing intricate emotional patterns in both yourself and others.

You can distinguish between your own emotional experience and another person’s, understanding that they might feel entirely differently in the same situation.

For example, you might realize you feel frustrated about a friend’s decision while simultaneously appreciating that they feel proud and hopeful about their choice – all without your emotions clouding your perception of theirs.

Personality and Emotional Awareness

Do you tend to follow your heart or your head when making decisions? This basic personality difference can significantly impact how readily you tune into emotions.

Thinking personality types are naturally more oriented toward logical analysis. They value objectivity and often set emotions aside to focus on facts when making choices.

On the other hand, Feeling personalities tend to incorporate their emotional experiences into every aspect of their lives. These individuals often prioritize emotional impact over pure logic when weighing options.

Our research shows that just 47% of people with the Thinking trait say they value and cherish their emotions, compared to 88% of those with the Feeling trait.

This doesn’t mean Thinking personalities aren’t aware of their own emotions as they occur, just that they’re less likely to hold them in high regard when making decisions.

The Thinking versus Feeling scale also affects how we perceive others’ emotional states.

According to our research, 57% of people with the Thinking trait say that they have a hard time understanding people’s feelings compared to only 17% of those with the Feeling trait.

This difference presents unique challenges for people with either personality trait.

Thinking types may need to intentionally develop the habit of checking in with their emotions, as they might naturally bypass this step in favor of logical analysis. When overwhelmed, they might disconnect from emotions entirely.

Feeling types can face the opposite challenge of becoming so immersed in emotional experiences that objectivity becomes difficult. They might also absorb others’ emotions so readily that distinguishing their own feelings becomes challenging.

Understanding your natural tendencies allows you to develop targeted strategies for building emotional awareness.

How to Improve Emotional Awareness

Emotional awareness isn’t built overnight, but small daily habits can make a big difference, and it can also help you learn how to control your emotions.

Here are some practical steps you can take to strengthen your ability to recognize and name what you’re feeling:

1. Pause and tune in: Several times a day, take a brief moment to check in with yourself. This might be during transitions between activities, before important events, or whenever you notice a shift in your energy. Ask yourself: “What am I feeling right now?” Don’t rush to answer – give yourself space to notice.
2. Start with physical awareness: Begin by scanning your body for physical sensations. Notice where you feel tension, energy, or discomfort. Is your chest tight? Shoulders raised? Stomach fluttery? Jaw clenched? These physical sensations are important clues to your emotional state.
3. Move beyond physical sensations: Once you’ve noticed these bodily signals, ask yourself what emotion might be connected to them. A racing heart could indicate anxiety, excitement, or fear. Tension in your shoulders might signal stress or anger. With practice, you’ll begin to recognize patterns in how your body expresses different emotions.
4. Expand your emotional vocabulary: Many of us are limited by knowing only a handful of words that describe emotion (good, bad, happy, sad). This restricts our ability to accurately identify what we’re feeling. Resources like the Feelings Wheel by Dr. Gloria Willcox or the Mood Meter from Yale can help you develop more precise language for your emotions.

The Mood Meter: Mapping Your Emotions

One challenge many people face when working on emotional awareness is the abstract nature of emotions themselves. How do you practice identifying something you can’t directly see or touch?

Dr. Marc Brackett, founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence, introduced the Mood Meter in 2013. This simple visual tool transforms abstract emotional experiences into something concrete and measurable.

The Mood Meter has proven so effective that it’s now used in thousands of schools and organizations worldwide.

This color-coded grid plots emotions along two dimensions:

• Pleasantness (horizontal axis): How pleasant or unpleasant are your feelings?
• Energy level (vertical axis): How much energy do you have?

These dimensions create four colored quadrants:

• Red (high energy, unpleasant): Anger, stress, anxiety
• Yellow (high energy, pleasant): Joy, excitement, enthusiasm
• Blue (low energy, unpleasant): Sadness, disappointment, fatigue
• Green (low energy, pleasant): Calmness, contentment, relaxation

By identifying where your current emotion falls on this grid, you can move beyond vague descriptions like “fine” or “bad” to understand the specific nature of your feelings.

To make this practice even more accessible, Dr. Brackett and his team have developed the “How We Feel” app. This digital tool helps you track your emotions throughout the day, build your emotional vocabulary, and recognize patterns in your emotional life.

Regular practice with tools like the Mood Meter can transform your emotional awareness from vague impressions to clear recognition, the essential first step in developing emotional intelligence.

Taking the Next Step on Your Emotional Journey

Now that you understand what emotional awareness is and how to develop it, the next step is simply to begin.

Start by setting aside a few moments each day to check in with yourself. Notice your physical sensations, identify the emotions connected to them, and gradually build your emotional vocabulary.

Consider taking our free personality test to gain deeper insights into your natural emotional tendencies. Understanding where you fall on the Thinking-Feeling scale can help you recognize your inherent strengths and potential blind spots when it comes to emotional awareness.

Remember, the beauty of high emotional awareness is that it’s accessible to everyone, regardless of personality type or background.

With consistent practice and the right tools you can develop emotional awareness, improve your relationships, and get better at staying calm as emotions come and go throughout your life.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is emotional awareness?

Emotional awareness is your ability to notice and name your feelings. It’s like having a dictionary for your emotions that helps you understand what’s happening inside you. Understanding emotions is the foundation for managing them effectively and communicating better with others.

What is an example of emotionally aware behavior?

An emotionally aware person might notice they’re feeling tense and recognize they’re anxious about an upcoming presentation. Instead of just thinking “I feel bad,” they can identify specific emotions like nervousness, excitement, and concern. This person can also pick up on how others are feeling, like noticing when a friend seems sad despite a smile.

How do you develop emotional awareness?

Improving emotional awareness takes practice. Start by checking in with yourself several times daily. Ask yourself how you are feeling. Notice physical sensations in your body, like a tight chest or butterflies in your stomach. Use a feelings wheel to expand your emotional vocabulary beyond just “good” or “bad.” Try tools like the Mood Meter to help with recognizing and understanding emotions at different energy levels.

How can you improve emotional awareness?

To improve emotional awareness, try keeping an emotion journal where you track feelings throughout the day. Pay attention to patterns – certain people, places, or activities might consistently trigger specific emotions. Challenge yourself to identify increasingly subtle emotional states and practice understanding emotions in others by actively listening to what they express.

Further Reading

• Waves of Feeling: How to Control Your Emotions
• Why Am I So Triggered? Making Sense of Your Emotional Triggers
• Emotional Intelligence and Personality Types: What’s Missing?