INTJ Personality and Emotions

INTJs are defined by their confidence, logic, and exceptional decision-making, but all of this hides a turbulent underbelly – their emotions. The very notion of emotional expression is synonymous with irrationality and weakness to many INTJs, a display of poor self-governance and fleeting opinion that can hardly stand up to the enduring light of factual truth.

This mistrust of emotions is understandable, as Feeling (F) is the most weakly developed trait for INTJs – like any complex tool, skilled hands can use it to remarkable effect, while untrained hands make clumsy and dangerous work.

People with the INTJ personality type take pride in remaining rational and logical at all times, considering honesty and straightforward information to be paramount to euphemisms and platitudes in almost all circumstances. In many ways though, these qualities of coolness and detachment aren’t the weapons of truth that they appear to be, but are instead shields designed to protect the inner emotions that INTJs feel. In fact, because their emotions are such an underdeveloped tool, INTJs often feel them more strongly than many overtly emotional types because they simply haven’t learned how to control them effectively.

INTJ personality and emotions

There Is Not a Truth Existing Which I Fear

This is a challenging paradigm for INTJs to manage, especially younger and more Turbulent types who are already less confident than they would like to appear. These feelings are contrary to INTJs’ idea of themselves as paragons of logic and knowledge, and they may go so far as to claim they have no emotions at all. This does not mean that people with the INTJ personality type should be seen as, nor should they aspire to be, cold-blooded and insensitive geniuses living by the mantra that emotions are for the weak. INTJs must understand that this isn’t the case, and isn’t ever going to be.

More mature and Assertive INTJs find more useful ways to manage their feelings. While they will never be comfortable with a truly public display of emotions, INTJs can learn to use them, to channel them alongside their logic to help them achieve their goals. While seemingly contradictory, this can be done in several ways.

Firstly, INTJs are goal-oriented, with long-term ideas founded on sound logic. When something does cause an emotional reaction, good or bad, that energy can be used to further those goals, aiding rational and pre-determined plans. Secondly, emotions are figurative canaries in the coal mine, indicating that something is off even though logic can’t see it yet. These feelings can help INTJs to use their logic to ask questions they may not have thought to ask. "This is upsetting. Why? What can be done to resolve it?"

Question With Boldness

In this way, emotions are not INTJs’ way of addressing a decision, but rather an indication that a decision needs to be addressed. INTJ personalities’ Thinking (T) trait acts as a protective big brother to their Feeling (F) trait – seeing that something has upset the less able sibling, it steps in to take action, letting logic do the talking and resolving the condition rather than complaining about its consequences.

There comes a time though, when logic is simply the wrong tool for the job, when there just isn’t a rational solution to a problem, and it is in these situations that INTJs must use their Feeling (F) trait most clearly. INTJs would do well to practice this from time to time, or at least be aware of it, because however they may try, it is impossible to truly separate emotion from the decision-making process. The fact is that INTJs do feel, and deeply, and this makes them better, not worse.

Mastermind_INTJ
2 years ago
Because we are the only personality type that supposedly "struggles with emotions". This is, regardless of however much so the writer of this article would like to argue, not the case. A underdeveloped sense of emotion in INTJs is because they are the type above all the rest that can truly achieve a 100% score in the Thinking category. This is, of course, because we are the one personality that uses logic to its greatest potential and have vain dislike of useless, temporary, fluctuating, or conflict causing variables. Feelings and emotion are, if you follow, prime examples of all 4 of those things.
Amused INTP
2 years ago
While frustratingly barring of logic, emotions are an important communication tool, and a useful factor in predicting and managing social interactions. Especially when interacting with personality types that are very emotion driven, which, as I'm sure you're aware, are not completely avoidable. On another note, there's no point in being 'above the rest' if you don't completely understand what it is you're supposed to be superior to.
9 months ago
I think one of the reasons INTJs struggle with emotions is that they are so logical, logic cannot be applied very well to emotions.
Iambugster15
2 years ago
In response to some older comments, it seems like the only time I really repress or don't openly express emotion is when I put them on my mental "deal with later" list, or when that emotion would be inconveniencing to people around me, though the emotion is still felt
INTJ - 100% Introvert
2 years ago
This is basically a partial monologue reply to the comment by the INTP below me. It was really only until recently that I have inspected my emotional state because beforehand I was completely focused on doing well in school and accumulating knowledge. As well as going through various phases of self-improvement because I plan out what traits and skills I want to improve in myself. I realized a year ago that I rarely thought about my emotions. Looking back, I thought about all the times I suppressed my emotions. For example, when someone's actions directly affect me and anger me, I force into the back of my mind and just let it pass. The other times I despaired at my lack of social courage and gave up on a crush I had for several years. This I just glossed over and effectively convinced myself that I didn't need romantic relationships and for a parting shot I suppressed sexual feelings around girls as well, though in public only. All this amounted to a glaring social weakness yet at the same time there was a contradiction. I had over the years managed to garner a reputation at my school as being a smart, kind guy who you could ask questions. In addition, I have plenty of friends, and another contradiction is that I never showed my emotions to any of these friends and extremely rarely to my family who I have an excellent relationship with. I think all this adds up to that I am a more developed INTJ but I still kept that huge distrust of emotion and managed a way to appear socially acceptable. What I have become is the social chameleon of sorts because I can adapt to any social situation even though I may not truly care about what is being talked about. I have become a master at deception even though it may not be the best course.
Introvert
3 years ago
I wish there are more female INTJ's in the world. As a female INTJ, I find it difficult to mingle with my fellow girls in high school because they are too emotional. I am extremely solitary and private, but I am socially outgoing if I can talk about important things like politics, science, or history. I absolutely LOATHE how conceited and vain people can be nowadays. I'm glad my type of personality is actually classified. I'm proud to bear the name of INTJ.
Anonymous
2 years ago
I am an INFJ, married to an INTJ, and although I am at the most sensitive and emotional end of the scale, I have never related to most of the typical brand of girl emotions, for lack of a better word. I don't understand girl chitchat and have often felt very misunderstood, but INFJs are somewhat complex and empathic, making for an unusual thought-life with intensity.
Anonymous
2 years ago
I'm a female INTJ, 17 years old. I completely agree, the only girl I have met who I can relate to the most is an INTP and we're best friends. People have commented on how alike we are. But we also compliment each other, like when I unnecessarily over plan things and don't realize, all she has to do is say "If you want to do it, then I think you should. Because etc etc etc". Then because we have such a similar train thought I can immediately understand her reasoning. It's great, but she is the only one I know. I only have one other friend, though I'm not sure which type she is. I can't relate to her as easily though.
Deniz
3 years ago
I think my emotions are logical. Is this even a thing? Logical emotion? It seems to be the best description.
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